I don’t feel brave right now. I am sitting at my desk, feeling I have « not really done anything today ». And a lack of inspiration to « tackle » the world.
Since this morning I walked out barefoot in the countryside, prepared a delicious breakfast of strawberries and papaya, talked with Laure, watered the tomatoes, did some slow body movements, slept for 3 hours, made cucumber water, sprouted some wheat, …
Somehow it doesn’t feel enough. My mind is racing through the todo list I stocked up since a few days, suggesting « At least get one thing done. At least one. »
Is this all I am going to do today? Is this all I have to give?
All the while I have been contributing leisure, startlement, slowness, rest, enchantment at the morning chirps, figuring out a simple monday dish of rosemary pasta, wishing all humans connect deeper with nature as they eat food which has grown from the land, being tender, generous with my time, staring at shadows of trees …
How did I come to ask that I am not « efficient » enough? How did I ever come to view Life through the very small (and somewhat unatural) lense of efficiency?
Is Life about craming it all in there, like a fully packed Matatu ? Matatus are Kenyan minibuses which seem to carry an almost unlimited quantity of passengers. When you think they can’t fit anyone else, 4 or 5 more hop on, again and again.
Isn’t Life wider, more generous and accepting?
Had I only given the world a woundrous gaze today, wouldn’t it have been just grand?
So when you feel you aren’t getting enough done
Give your day a glorious gaze
And let the world smile back at you in content